I want to write, but my emotions are all tangled. There is so much inside of me that when all tries to come out only hurts of messy thoughts burp out. It is not yet purging. This is the chaos inside trying to settle. That’s all.
I start somewhere.
As always, in harmony with nature. Mother Nature has been purging since the 5th of December. Mourning the departure of her beloved son and so will be until his physical body is laid to rest in her womb on Sunday the 15th. Tears roll down her face, not silently, but in bursts of loud cries, now drumming through the skies of Johannesburg, then with soft, musical tears, singing her lullaby to the children of Africa.
I am going back, stepping back through the sorrows of 2013. I want to cry, but I can’t yet! Although tears may wave out of my eyes, the depth of my soul remains seemingly dark, cold.
I am quietly awaiting the tumult that will bring it all up and out, still, gathering my strength for that ultimate cleansing roar.